Tuesday, July 9, 2013

Silent Voices

Mason is almost 2  and a half. I am so proud of how far he has come in  year.

Tomorrow is his first field trip with school. They are taking a karate class.

I have no way to communicate with my son to find out how he liked the class.

I cannot ask if it was fun. His vocabulary consists of  6 words-only two he uses himself without prompting.

He says "good" (ga) if he is happy. If he sees or hears a dog, he says a made up word "ara".

His other words-

If I spell M-A-S-O-N he says "Desen"

If I say "cup", he says "bup" but he does not say it to indicate he is thirsty.

He is starting to say "Daddy" but it is usually prompted.

Sometimes when he sees the letter "E" he will say "EEEEEEEEE"

Sometimes for the word "yay" he says "day" but it does not happen much.

He cannot shake his head yes or no to answer me.

He is just beginning to gesture. He can sign "more" if he wants something. He can indicate what he wants if I give him a choice between two things by touching his choice, or grunting "eh" if he does not want something.

If I don't understand his wants, he slams his head against something hard and screams.

Most of his communication is repetitive-he wants me to label objects that he already knows the names of.  he touches the table, he touches the floor, a picture, a pillow.

His receptive language is so delayed, saying "Did you have fun today" is like saying it to an infant.

So tomorrow I will have no idea if he enjoyed his first field trip.

But when I pick him up from school, he jumps up and down. He flaps his arms in excitement. And I pick him up and he hugs me and puts his head on my shoulder.

He will say "ga" which I know means he is happy.

Our ride home is silent.

I long for the day when I can say

"Did you have a fun day?"

And he can nod his head.

Until then, we will sit in our very comfortable silence, on the way home from school.

Me, wondering what the future holds. And Mason smiling at me with not a care in the world.

I am scared shitless. 


  1. Wow. Just as vividly as I can envision that quiet car ride home and your longing for the day it is broken with news about his day, I can also clearly see how excited Mason is when you pick him up from school. I wonder if, in some ways, the silence makes those jump up and down, "ga" moments even more precious? Not that it makes the quiet moments any less sad.

  2. It really does make them more special, I think :)